You just have to keep left

This to me now is a great example of how history becomes his story and its does not have to make any  sense . If you keep telling the story often enough in time people will accept it as fact. One day way back in the day I was sitting in a classroom I was to be precise in a history lesson. While  I was in this lesson the teacher said words to the effect Christopher Columbus( cristobal  colon) discovered the Americas by accident.  Now even at my tender years  I thought that’s a bit hard to be believe and I said so. The teacher asked me if I wanted to rewrite history and thou the idea did appeal to me I declined. We had a decent library in the school i attended so i thought i might visit the place and i did. Now the teacher said Columbus had set out to go to India so I thought look at a atlas son and i did. This was a revelation the Americas are nowhere near India it bloody miles away  its right on the other side. That was some shit sat nav!! Seriously how is that possible.  How is it possible to get it so wrong.  When I was told this it was back in the sixties long before sat nav the  only possible explanation I could come up with was that. Christopher Columbus had his A  to  Z upside down or sideways.

Now I will not lay any claims to being a navigator and I am rubbish with directions I get lost all over the place. So I am not going to give old chris a hard time on his direction finding but even i could have done better. I had a look at the atlas and you come outa Spain your into the Mediterranean  sea  depending which part of Spain you leave from. He seemed to managed to  get into the Atlantic sea ok so far so good. The rest of it really should be a piece of piss  honestly have a look. You come out and keep to the left that’s it as simple as that keep left you can’t go wrong. Now I like a bit of history and I have noticed that  a lot of these sailors like to have a good night out before they leave on their journeys. So I am gonna give them a bit of leway here maybe there was some massive hangovers and the sun was in their eyes. How else can you explain the fact that nobody on board notice they were going the wrong way . I am assuming here because I don’t know but I am guessing that a couple of the people on board had been to India before I could be wrong. Maybe nobody on board was a experience sailor. But I find it hard to believe that he set off with a load of blokes he  append to meet down the pub  or down the club, maybe he advertised who knows.  I find it really hard to believe old chris set off  without maps I mean you just wouldn’t  would you, since those were pre sat nav days that would have been very silly, maybe it was left in the pub.

On this maps he would have noticed that if you keep left you will pass Africa not all of it because it’s a big place,. its  stretching the imagination a bit this. You keep to the left you go all the way down the west side of Africa you keep to the left at the bottom your into the Indian ocean. You keep to the left sorry if I am getting boring it is what it is. You can see India now  in a couple of days you have reach your destination where the problem?

Sir never told me how long it took Columbus  to get to the Americas. I guessed so I gave it a week. Unless they was just partying hard someone must have noticed the absence of the African coastline. Someone must have gone you know what chris I don’t think we going the right way where Africa gone ?.  Come out a spain and go straight no left no right you finish up in the Americas. Gobsmacked I was I thought maybe I do wanna rewrite history this has got to be bullshit really. If the steering lock was on and the key was broken I could understand it you know what I mean what can you do.  Bit of a old banger dodgy m.o.t these things happen limited funds you get what you can afford.  This was starting to alarm me this is too obvious I must be missing something  why didn’t he turn round. My twelve year old mind was in confusion I must look into this further have a good look.


In the same section of our lovely library that contained books about Christopher Columbus discovering the Americas. There  was books about the Inca’s the Aztec and lots of others. Now these people were really into gold they had it all over the place like the African with the diamonds it was no big thing to them.  The place was gleaming with gold you could probably see it from Spain. It turned out that people in Europe were more than aware of these places ok what’s  going on here ?. According to sir, Christopher Columbus thought the world was 25% smaller so by sailing to the west he would get to the east quicker!! I kid you not. It was a theory he had been banging on about for years according to sir chris thought he had landed in japan at first. This was beginning to do my head in was it possible, that in this theory of mr cristobal colon he didn’t notice this huge land mass across the Atlantic sea ?. Imagine my parents send me to school to get educated and them a talk stupidness to me.  I wasn’t having it and I told sir it don’t make no sense sir and he wasn’t having that nor was the headmaster. I was told that when exam time  come i will have to write their version or fail simple. The library didn’t give me any more clues to the navigational incompetence of mr colon. As the years went by I began to learn more about the intentions of old Columbus even now there is still conflicting theories about the facts. What cannot be argued  is the fact that Christopher Columbus did not land on the Americas by accident. I feel vindicated the twelve year  old me had detected bullshit and my bullshit detector had worked.

Without going into the whole story which you can research yourself since you have internet now. The whole thing from the start was a  revenue generating exercise or put another way lets go steal some gold. You can find out who finance the trip how the whole thing was put together and why.  Christopher Columbus didn’t have a sat nav he didn’t  have a  A to Z  but he did have a navigator. Old Columbus made four trips over there (he forget about India now) they were very profitable trips he got rich. Mr Cristobal Colon set out with several ships and about ninety men black, white, mixed race all sorts.  Without the sat nav or the AtoZ   Christopher Columbus relied on the navigator  el negro.   His name was Pedro Alonso or Pedro Peralonso also known as Pedro Alonso Nino he was on two of Columbus trips. He was on the first trip there  is some confusion still about which ship he was on amazingly Santa  Maria  or Santa Clara  which was nicknamed LA Nina(the girl). All the ships had nicknames the girl, the prostitute etc  he was on one of them. Pedro Peralonso is depending on who wrote it a  African  a African/Moor or a Moor he is listed as an explorer.

Apparently in his early years he explored the coast of Africa honestly, accident my arse.  The man knew exactly where he was going and what he was going there for. He too became very rich although in later life things went a bit pears shape for him. He had a little dispute with the powers that be and they messed him up you can check all this out yourselves. My only beef is that they couldn’t come up with a better story, by accident!! I mean please. What is even more unbelievable is that they still chatting this shit in our schools. Even thou I am way past being that twelve year old on behalf on that twelve year old me I would like to say to sir and the head master UP YOURS with you bullshit.    Pedro  Alonso /Pedro Peralonso/El Negro may have been a money grabbing piece of shit ,but I am standing up for  his navigational ability. I aint  letting them slag you off  bro about you never know how to pilot the ship them.  He was an explorer  a navigator a business man abit of a del boy. Him and his brothers were merchants and his trip was another husssle . In conclusion  all that sir told me was foolishness Columbus,Pedro the financers were all about stealing peoples things. They killed off the people with guns and disease then come tell us lies.